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Shedding

June 12, 2020/ Karen Bowers

[creative nonfiction]

My hair is falling out. 

The salon stylist says, “You lose a thousand a day.” I think she means a hundred. I scratch my head and three drift to the floor.

 A loner tickles my bare shoulder and I drag a finger-comb from my scalp to the shaggy split-ends. Six filaments from my clenched fist end up in the wastebasket. The tease and tug are pushing obsession buttons. I react to phantom touches, swipe, and come away with nothing. Repeat.

The ceiling fan’s draft dispatches a messenger. The solitary reminder sticks to my t-shirt. A platoon of paratroopers are on deck, ready to drop. Maybe I’m shedding. It’s July. Hotter than, well, too hot for overthinking. Michael and I consummated our relationship on the 4th of July. I wipe dead soldiers out of the bathroom sink. I’m done with fireworks.

Wisps snake across the sunlit pillowcase. These aren’t the cat’s; hers are short.

“I stick shampooed hairs that come out on the shower wall, to keep them from clogging the drain. Sometimes I swirl the soapy bunch into abstract compositions with my finger.” The stylist doubles over, laughing.

Wisps snake across the sunlit pillowcase. These aren’t the cat’s; hers are short. She can leave whole whiskers on the bed from licking herself clean. I rub my head, feel around for bald patches. 

The floors are less messy than before. Strands accumulating in corners and sticking to my bare feet gross me out. I coil the cord, shove the sweeper in the closet. The sloughing starts every June, like clockwork. Michael died in June.

I pluck an interloper buried in the fresh baked apricot crisp and carry it to the compost bucket on the kitchen counter. The light catches a dangler in my face and I yank at it. This molting has got to stop. It can’t last forever. 

By August I should be back to normal. 

There’s a brush across my neck, but I don’t see anything. Look closer. Refocus. A fine strand waves “I’m over here, in the breeze.” I tenderly separate the trespasser from around my neck and let it fly.

Photo Credit: Shoot for the Moon

When photography converted from film to digital, Karen Bowers retired as a commercial photographer and moved to the Florida Keys where she reinvented herself as a destination marketer. She promoted and directed a successful southernmost beach launch dragon boat race until relocating to Arizona. She currently writes from her 1914 tiny home hermitage and works as a pro tem librarian in rural Arizona, substituting whenever and wherever needed throughout Yavapai County. She has completed a memoir titled Pushed off the High Dive. “Shedding” is her first published essay.

Issue Archive

  • Issue 21: Summer/Fall 2022
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  • Issue 18: Winter/Spring 2021
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  • Issue 16: Winter/Spring 2020
  • Issue 15: Summer/Fall 2019
  • Issue 14: Winter/Spring 2019
  • Issue 13: Summer/Fall 2018
  • Issue 12: Winter/Spring 2018
  • Issue 11: Summer/Fall 2017
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Genre Archive

  • Creative Nonfiction
  • Essays
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  • Flash Prose
  • Lunch Specials
  • Poetry
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Friday Lunch Blog

Friday Lunch! A serving of contemporary essays published every Friday.

Today’s course:

Where Are You From?

August 5, 2022/in Blog / Majella Pinto
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The Old Folks’ Home

July 22, 2022/in Blog / Karen Gaul Schulman
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Peace, Love, and a lot of Loud Rock & Roll

June 17, 2022/in A Transfer, Blog / Sunee Lyn Foley
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Midnight Snack

A destination for all your late night obsessions.

Tonight’s bites:

QVC-land

May 6, 2022/in A Transfer, Midnight Snack / D. E. Hardy
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Escape Artists at the End of the World

April 29, 2022/in A Transfer, Midnight Snack / Lisa Levy
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The House in the Middle

April 15, 2022/in A Transfer, Midnight Snack / Megan Vasquez
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More coming soon!

Amuse-Bouche

Little bites every Monday to whet your appetite!

Today’s plate:

My Mother’s Hands

August 8, 2022/in Amuse-Bouche / Annie Marhefka
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Defy Gravity

August 1, 2022/in Amuse-Bouche / Megan Peck
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Little Shrimp

July 25, 2022/in Amuse-Bouche / Karen Poppy
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School Lunch

An occasional Wednesday series dishing up today’s best youth writers.

Today’s slice:

I’ve Stayed in the Front Yard

May 12, 2021/in School Lunch, School Lunch 2021 / Brendan Nurczyk
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A Communal Announcement

April 28, 2021/in School Lunch, School Lunch 2021 / Isabella Dail
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Seventeen

April 14, 2021/in School Lunch, School Lunch 2021 / Abigail E. Calimaran
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Word From the Editor

The variety in this issue speaks not only to the eclectic world we inhabit but to the power of the human spirit. We live in an uncertain world. In the U.S., we’re seeing mass shootings daily. Across the world, we’re still very much in a pandemic, some being trapped in their homes for weeks on end, others struggling to stay alive in hospitals. War continues to wage in Ukraine. Iran and North Korea are working diligently to make nuclear weapons. The list goes on. Still, we have artists who are willing and able to be vulnerable with one another, to share stories and art to help us try and make sense of our world.

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